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    October 15

    很难

         今天突然想来MSN上看看,好久没来了,平时也想不到它了。突然发现其实这就是一种很亲切的感觉啊,这两天比较郁闷所以想到MSN了,真觉得以往很对不起它。
     
         从周1开始吧,每天腰酸背痛,睡的很多还是觉得睡眠不足,周二总算是搞定了英语课的PPT,又要开始准备鑫哥的作业,而我这两天看那本高层次综合的书又看得头昏脑胀,但还是得坚持每天看一些,因为既然是两个人一组,我也不能甩手不管,假如到时候全丢给别人那我也太差劲了。设计方法学这个课的任务还没有开始做,很艰巨的样子,我暂时也管不了了,先过了这两周再说。今天下午又听说专业英语也要做PPT讲,而且我们下下周就讲……
     
         至于实验室的事情,我今天终于反省自己,觉得自己也太能拖拉,但是我也实在是很烦,做个东西,干扰因素那么多,让我怎么处理啊?老板似乎又要求特别高,一点小小的问题都一定要有个说法,唉,现在他肯定对我失望的很啊!但是我也很苦恼啊,可能我就这么笨了。
     
         现在基本上每天我都会抽出点时间看英语,但是又老觉得浪费时间,课程上的事,实验的事都那么多,但是如果不看吧,又会想自己现在的努力不也是为了要出国吗?又很矛盾……
     
         现在我真的发现有些事情很难,比如“做自己想做的事”,这就常常不能实施。有时我有苦恼向别人倾诉的时候才发现其实别人也有很多苦衷,就像叶同学,还有水水水等等,我和他们聊天的时候也觉得他们很累或者很烦,但我有时还是控制不住抱怨我现在的生活,然后自己又很内疚。
     
         今天晚上我郁闷了很久,终于想通了一些,我就这样做下去吧,不管结果怎么样了,尽力而为。

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    芳 任wrote:
    过一段时间就会好,一阵子一阵子的。加油啊,哥们儿!
    Oct. 16

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